The Reality of Grief: When Secondary Loss Shows Up as a Gain

The Reality of Grief: When Secondary Loss Shows Up as a Gain

This is a hard one to put out there.

In my work, I talk often about grief literacy and secondary losses. Recently I realized that one of my own secondary losses has been the sense of familiarity I used to have with my own body.

This story is not about weight. It’s about identity, confidence, and the ways grief reshapes us in quiet but profound ways. Even with years of experience in grief education, living through these changes has been humbling.

I’m sharing this piece because I believe vulnerability is part of grief literacy and because many people are carrying similar invisible shifts.

If it resonates, you can read the full story here: 

https://medium.com/women-write/the-reality-of-grief-when-secondary-loss-shows-up-as-a-gain-2bd2f0819842

Open to Hope: The Sounds of Grief

Open to Hope: The Sounds of Grief

I recently published my first piece as an author for Open to Hope: The Sounds of Grief.

Since my mom died, I’ve been cataloguing what I think of as “the sounds of grief.” So far, I’ve documented five. Some are raw and animalistic. Others are quiet, barely audible. One is silence. And one may be surprising.

Writing this essay gave me a new way to sit with my own grief while also exploring the universal (yet deeply personal) ways loss expresses itself.

You can read the full piece here: https://www.opentohope.com/the-sounds-of-grief/

As you do, I invite you to reflect: What does your grief sound like?

Op-ed: Grief Literacy Can Change Lives

Op-ed: Grief Literacy Can Change Lives

What if grief education started before the crisis?
What if we grew up learning that grief is part of life—and not a detour from it?
What if our schools, sports fields, and community centers were places where grief wasn’t something to fix or fear—but something we knew how to recognize, support, and move through together?

I wrote this op-ed as an invitation to imagine that world.

Grief literacy isn’t about having the “right” words. It’s about creating space. About learning to show up with care, curiosity, and courage. And the ripple effects? They’re powerful.

Whether you’re a parent, teacher, neighbor, clinician, or just someone who’s ever cared deeply, you have a role to play in making your community more grief-informed.

Give it a read by clicking here.

Speaking Grief Blog: You Don’t Need to Be a “Feelings Person” to Offer Meaningful Support to Someone Who Is Grieving

Speaking Grief Blog: You Don’t Need to Be a “Feelings Person” to Offer Meaningful Support to Someone Who Is Grieving

When it comes to grief, we often mistakenly think if we’re not “good with feelings,” we have nothing to offer a grieving person. That is categorically false. Emotional support is an element of grief support, but it’s not the only element. From companionship during a soothing activity to practical assistance with the tasks of daily living, there are many ways you can show up for someone who is grieving. Read my latest blog post for Penn State Outreach to learn more by clicking here.

Speaking Grief Blog: Grief-Aware Gatherings

Speaking Grief Blog: Grief-Aware Gatherings


The latest in an on-going blog series for Penn State Outreach:

Discussing grief and the holidays is tricky. It can contribute to the false narrative that grief follows some sort of predictable path. For some, the winter holiday season can activate grief. For others, these seemingly fraught weeks might pass without any major upticks in emotion—only for a random Wednesday in March to bring an unexpected wave of feeling. Still, the winter holiday season offers a unique moment to explore the delicate balance of navigating social spaces while carrying grief. While every situation is unique, I offer some thoughtful ways to include your grieving person in social gatherings while honoring their grief experience in this latest blog post. Click here to read.

PTA “Our Children” Blog: Is it a Behavior Problem or is it Grief?

PTA “Our Children” Blog: Is it a Behavior Problem or is it Grief?

Is it a behavior problem, or is it grief?

When kids act out, shut down, or struggle in school, it’s easy to assume it’s defiance, attention-seeking, or a lack of discipline. But sometimes, it’s grief.

In this post for the PTA Our Children Blog, I explore how grief in children often doesn’t look like sadness—it can show up as anger, anxiety, forgetfulness, or even physical complaints. And when we misinterpret these signs, we risk responding in ways that isolate rather than support them.

Read it here.

If you work with or love a grieving child, I hope this piece offers insight and practical ways to help.